The Official Internet Homepage: REAL ULTIMATE POWER

The Official Internet Webpage

Real Ultimate Power

Hi, this site is all about the internet, the REAL internet This site is awesome. My name is Rolf and I can't stop thinking about the internet. This thing is cool; and by cool, I mean totally sweet.

Facts:

1. The internet is a network.

2. The internet transfers data ALL the time.

3. The purpose of the internet is to link up and connect people.

Pictures and diagrams:

internet people internet terminal

internet map

Testimonial:

The internet can disconnect anyone it wants! The internet drops packets ALL the time and doesn't even think twice about it. This thing is so crazy and awesome that it disseminates information ALL the time. I heard that the internet was transferring data. And when some dude cut through a fiber-optic line with a backhoe, the internet rerouted a whole subnet. My friend Raneff said that he saw the internet totally freeze a some kid's computer just because the kid opened another window.

And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't believe that the internet has REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or it will delete your email!!! It's an easy choice, if you ask me.

The internet is sooooooooooo sweet that I want to crap my pants. I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. This thing is totally awesome and that's a fact. Computers are fast, smooth, hot, shiny, powerful, and sweet. I can't wait to start kernel hacking next year. I love the internet with all of my body (including my pee pee).

Q and A:.

Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about the internet?

A: The internet is the ultimate paradox. On the one hand the internet is totally disorganized and chaotic, but on the other hand, computers are very careful and precise.

Q: I heard that the internet is always slow or buggy. What's its problem?

A: Whoever told you that is a total liar. Just like other networks, the internet can be slow OR totally awesome.

Q: What does the internet do when it's not transferring data or dropping packets?

A: Most of its free bandwidth is spent downloading pr0n, but sometimes is spreads viruses. (Ask Raneff if you don't believe me.)